Spoiler: It was never actually about Ted Lasso

By Dan Ayer, Co-Founder, Oyster Creative Co.

Since Summer 2020 I’ve shared roughly 66,438,721 gifs of one Theodore Lasso (don’t check the math, I got a degree in English)with my team. From motivational to silly, crazy dancing to comforting, and the equally essential ‘Believe’ to ‘Hold My Beer.’

Ted Lasso premiered on Apple+ in 2020 and was discovered by the world a few months later. The show preached a level of kindness and compassion during a time filled with pandemic driven fear and outrage over the George Floyd murder.

It was also a time that forced us into the first real crisis period as an agency. What do we do about the office? How can we keep our team safe, happy and, yea, employed? How can we handle a world of shit all around us?

I was lucky enough to have a business partner who doesn’t look at a glass as half full, but as “Oh, wow. Look at that glass! How cool is that? There’s water in this glass? This is awesome.” Jeff’s unflappable optimism is the perfect counterbalance to my occasional Eeyore-approach to things.

I also found a lot of comfort in watching Ted Lasso and sharing his folksy, positive approach to managing his team. How Ted was able to lead and care at the same time. Sadly, caring male leaders aren’t seen a whole lot in TV and movies. And I’ll admit, growing up in the world of sports I was coached by a lot more Bobby Knights than Teds.

But at a time when we were all shut away a bit, Ted reminded me a lot of another mustached male who taught me just about everything about how to treat people — my Dad.

I won’t pretend for a second that my Dad has the wit of an SNL comedian like Jason Sudeikis or the folkiness his character brings to the screen. But where he does run laps around Ted is his ability to start a conversation with anyone. Anyone. We’ve both affectionately and angrily referred to him as “Mr. Mayor” for how he greets and befriends whoever he meets.

Growing up my Dad was an all-star athlete and Eagle Scout. Played just about every sport in high school and a few in college. But the version I grew up with was a guy who did everything imaginable for his family. He had a nice paying job that could have got him a new car and fancy vacation every year.

How did he spend that money? It went to saving for college so that his kids could graduate from two small liberal arts colleges without a cent of debt (sorry, about those school choices, Dad). Oh, and to help purchase a house for some family members so they could stay in their home late in their lives.

I’m sure he had co-workers questioning why he didn’t spend more on himself — but he never did.

So when Ted tells a reporter doing a story on his arrival as coach: “For me, success is not about the wins and losses. It’s about helping these young fellas be the best versions of themselves on and off the field.” I saw a bit of my Dad.

Ted was a football coach in the US before a twist of family fate brought him to England to coach soccer. While there, each morning Ted brings cookies to work for ‘Biscuits with the Boss.’ A chance to talk and build a relationship with his boss. The biscuits are exquisite and she constantly inquires where he purchased them. Toward the end of the first episode, you see that Ted is actually baking them each night for her. Not the typical football head-coach vibe you often see.

And that’s where I saw a lot more of my Dad.

About eight years ago my Dad retired from that job and got ready to spend his retirement riding across the country on his bike and traveling around the world with his wife. Then the twist, seven years ago my Mom was diagnosed with cancer. The kind where you spend nearly a year getting chemotherapy and at least another year recovering from its impact.

She’s still here and has one amazing grandson and another who right now is probably chasing around the first.

How is she still here? Some amazing doctors and medicine. But also because of a guy, who when things didn’t go to plan, headed to the kitchen and taught himself to cook (well enough). He may have questioned why life was changing course or why his family had this challenge, but he never dwelled on them. He just found a way to make the biscuits.

That was the approach I always tried to take during these tough couple of years. I failed, Jeff failed, we failed as an agency plenty of times (Hey, it’s not all about the wins and losses…)

But we made every effort to make sure our team felt safe, valued and seen.

So the reason I share those Ted memes and gifs with our team is because it’s a lot easier to say lessons or inspiration through art or borrowed moments, than from where most of them actually come from.

And for guys? Well, it’s way harder to say what you really mean.

So this Father’s Day, I’ll just say this to my Dad: “Barbecue Sauce.”